It feels like just yesterday I was googling everything at 2am when I was rocking you to sleep - trying to figure out what I'm doing as a mom. Like I can still smell that newborn softness on your skin. But this year, this year changed something.
The baby fat in your cheeks slowly faded
Your legs stretched out, a little longer, a little thinner.
You grew into words and questions and opinions. You suddenly had favorite songs, favorite foods, and big feelings you could
name.
You started carrying on full conversations... ones that made me pause and think, who is this little girl I get to raise?
We left the "little girls" section at the store and moved into "big girls" and I wasn't ready for how much that would wreck me. It was a size tag. but it felt like a goodbye.
You still ask me to hold your hand sometimes, but not as much.
You still want me to pick you up, but you're getting heavier, and my arms know we don't have much time left.
Every day you rise a little closer to eye level.
Every day you grow a little further from my lap and a little closer to the world.
I feel pride and excitement with each milestone my children achieve, but these
"firsts" and "lasts" break my heart a bit too.
No one prepared me for the mix of emotions that comes with watching you grow.
Although I am excited about this new chapter in your life, my joy is mixed with sadness as I quietly say goodbye to the kindergarten version of you.
Tears dampen my cheeks as I watch you sing your final kindergarten performance and hug your teacher goodbye one last time.
I will miss these kindergarten days of innocence, sandbox play, and messy art projects.
I will miss the tiny backpack, the snack time stories, the sweet morning drop-offs where you still looked back to wave.
And yet, I'm so proud I could burst.
Proud of the way you love others. Proud of your heart.
Proud of how brave you were this year.
Proud of the little woman you're slowly becoming.
I wish I could stop time.
But I also can't wait to keep watching you become you.
And I hope you always know: no matter how big you get...
You'll always be my baby.
